The Brunei Bubble

Living in a isolated part of the world makes it slightly harder to get a sense of real life. They call the place I live in the "Brunei bubble", and with good reason too. Everything is too nice, safe and squeaky clean. No troubles or tension, nothing to be afraid of.

What's the problem with that?

People here seem to not know how life is lived outside of their comfy stretches of land. It's utterly boring. I want some excitement, some action, something to look forward to and something to fear. Life is never just a walk in the park, it's never smooth and easy rolling. There are hard times, there are really fun times too, but there are definitely going to be hard times.

I sound petty and selfish in this sense. Probably because people are questioning why I would want to criticize such a place that has a lack of crime and poverty. Well, I've lived here for twelve years; moving from Scotland (where my father is from) with my brother and mother (from Malaysia). All the years I've been here, never once have a felt a sense of achievement. Ruled by a single Sultan and his gang of relatives, they stand tall and proud and far better than mere citizens. Like most monarchies, their totalitarian and snobby attitude manifests - it doesn't seem to affect their people much, however. You can see police escorts guiding second cousins, aunties, uncles, nephews, nieces of the Sultan down a busy road because oh, best avoid the traffic. All well and good, your majesty ('s relatives).

I've never been a big believer in the idea of a monarchy. It's outdated and out of the people's control, creating a gap that will never be filled between ruler and subjects. The leader of the country should be a leader everyone wants not a leader that is within a certain family. Rules and regulations seem to be the top problem in the struggle for a Bruneian voice. Strict curfews, bans of gathering, extreme censorship, ban of alcohol and many other non-negotiable enforcement.

I'm struggling here, to see what I was so attracted to in the first place. When I was five, growing up here was bliss. Now I am seventeen and I don't see the appeal at all.

I am now pursuing a path to creativity in my mind, but any art form here is condemned. Impossible to gain an understanding of theatre, art and even dance I'm finding it hard to appreciate myself. People need some sort of closure when it comes to a perusal of your interests.

Life is not perfect, mine definitely isn't. I'm a manic-depressive and strong opinionated seventeen year old girl. I can never achieve artistic expression, what with the monarchy and hold on people's lives. All I can do is wait and hope that Brunei finds some sort of voice.

It is a beautiful place and it is an ideal place.
Just not for me.

                                  The sun going down by the river in Kuala Belait, Brunei

There is no way of summing up my views - my bipolar writing style is a challenge, but I really cannot express my feelings with words. I love and hate Brunei.

(I hope this is an adequate first post.)


Norliza.